ENNUI

The other day I was trying to figure out the differences in life during retirement and life during my working days. The stakes were high. If I concluded that life was better during my working days, then I would probably have to go back to work. That thought is anathema. The mental debate began this morning in a bad way. I'm bored. It seems that I have run out of goals. In my other life I accomplished many of my goals, even though while I was involved in some of them they didn't seem like "goals". I've been retired now for 25 years and during this time two of my goals were realized...I performed lead roles in seven "Broadway" musicals...here in our 600 seat condo "Theater of the Performing Arts". I always leaned toward an acting career, but wound up as an English teacher in high school. So, little did I suspect when I retired that there would be available a "second career" for me as a "senior" actor. These musicals culminated this year with 4 performances of "My Fair Lady" in which I was cast as Henry Higgins. This was a foregone conclusion since my wife, Rhoda was the producer. Now this career is also finished because I do not plan to perform in any more productions. Too much work, motivation, and energy required. And my desire for applause has abated.

The second goal I accomplished in my retirement was to write my autobiography which I titled, "Memoirs of a Tail Gunner". After all, I became a real person during WWII. When you fly 60 combat missions, you tend to become something that you weren't before you flew those missions. At any rate, I really published two books. The other contained most of the poems I ever wrote and is called "Addenda". It took me over a year to write the memoirs, so I wasn't afflicted with "ennui". I also played lots of golf and taught a few classes in Shakespeare here in our condo. Now, because of a physical problem, I"m no longer playing golf, and I'm not teaching any more classes.

I'm now a famous author that nobody knows trying to escape "ennui".
I'm doing little sedentary things like writing this blog. which like Topsy, keeps growing. I even change the font each time. This apparently is Georgian. I've also tried Ariel and Courier. Tomorrow might be Verdana. I look to different text colors to lift my spirits. Now, I'm worried about running out of things to blog about; also I'm fearful that no one is really tuned into these ruminations.

Well, now to continue the dialogue: How does retirement stack up to the working days? While I was working I had to rise at 6am most days in order to make the 7:45am Home Room, and then go ahead and teach 4 classes with the same things I'd been teaching for umpteen years. The primary thing that kept teaching from getting boring was that you saw different kids each year, and teenagers are diverse and funny. I loved them. Then, of course, I was helping Thelma to raise four kids...which definitely wasn't boring...but very hard work learning good parenting, and kind of making it up as you went along. I had no father model since mine died when I was nine, and I only have cursory memories of him as an invalid. So, in retirement I can sleep as late as I choose and rarely have reason to wake at 6am unless I have to catch a plane.

In retirement, you are on a very long vacation...provided you live long enough. You can go out to dine several nights a week; you can go on cruises; you can go to shows, museums, carnivals, flea markets, movies most anytime you want. So, in these respects, retirement is the better option. However--and this is a very huge "however"--in your working days you did not have to pop 15 medications every day, and you did not have to see a doctor most every week. Now I have a dermatologist, a pulmonologist, a cardiologist, an internist, a psychiatrist, a psychologist, a podiatrist, a chiropractor, an endodontist, a hygienist, a periodontist, and a few more that end in an "--or" or a "--ist". I certainly don't want to forget anybody.

So, there you are; I can't make a decision as to which life offers the least opportunity to suffer boredom; which life offers the richest opportunities to enjoy living. Perhaps someone out there in cyberland can help.

Nothing Works

Yesterday I went to Google and typed in "Coin counters". It came up with about 2,000,000 places I could buy one + shipping. Since I did not have the time to run through 2 million web sites, I took a chance and ran Office Depot, and was successful in finding they had a coin counter for $29.99. My current coin counter died a centsless death and Rho and I had no place to put our spare change except into a cup. The problem with that is when we need to wrap them, they all have to be laid out and separated on the floor and that's a nasty, boring, experience. So, I gleefully went to Office Depot and found that the machine I saw on the web was now selling for $21.99 and I bought it. I rushed home anticipating the joy I would have collecting all the change lying around the house and having this machine count them for me. So I unpacked it and put in two batteries and started dropping coins into it. When the quarter tube was filled, I opened it, took out the quarters and wrapped them. Then when I tried to nudge the tray back into place, it refused to be nudged, let alone budged. Didn't work no more. So, I took it back to the store and had it replaced with the same product. Only now I'm afraid to take it out of the box.

But, that's not the only thing that doesn't work. My ISP, Comcast has a "Chat" feature whereby if something bothers you, or something doesn't work, you can have a "live" chat with someone 24/7. Problem is, ever since Adelphia stopped working and passed their problems onto Comcast, Comcast doesn't work too well either. Every time I try to "Chat" I get an error message that they don't recognize my name and password. So, I'll just forget about chatting with a "live" person. Secondly, or thirdly, (I tend to forget where I am...so my memory has working problems), when I send an email, there is a "signature" feature. That doesn't work. No signatures get attached to my emails. Then when I forward a message to my email account at Excite.com, it gets bounced back to Comcast. So, that doesn't work. We recently bought a new stove with a glass top and when we tried to boil water in our well-used spaghetti pot, it got really hot, but the water never boiled. So, we had to go looking for pots that would work, when it was really the stove that was not working.

Up to now, I've been complaining about appliances, etc. not working. But as one reaches my stage in life, I've discovered that some of my own "appliances" have either stopped working, or do not work as well as formerly. By "formerly" I mean like when I was 18. My ears are malfunctioning, my legs are getting wobbly, my hair is turning color and getting thinner, my stomach is enlarging, and I could go on, but if I do, I'm fearful of getting depressed...so, enough of this.

Tonite we are dining out with my 90+ year old Aunt Belle and my sister and brother-in-law, Mickey. I don't remember the name of the restaurant, but it will most likely be in bankruptcy.

Dollars and Sense

I just got back from the World Savings Bank where I bought a CD selling for 5.41% for 8 months. I thought that was pretty cool, considering that other banks were not offering anything near that rate. So, it seemed to me good sense to go ahead and invest in it. Besides, it will mature on April 23, 2008, and that will be William Shakespeare's 443rd birthday. Also happens to be my cousin, Eddie's 85th birthday, I believe. I'll have to check with him... I suppose 85 is one of those "big" birthdays, and if so, I'll have to buy him a present...or at least a Hallmark card; not one of those flimsy 50% off cards with godawful rhyming poems that do not achieve the rank of Poetry. But to the CD...I really need to use good sense in my financial life. (I also have a dining out life, a xword puzzle life, a scrabble life, a blog life, a golfing life, etc). But back to good dollars and sense...The stock market is goofy; down triple digits one day; up triple digits the next. Not that I have a whole bunch of stocks. Actually, I own none. What I do have is an IRA with mutual funds that have stocks...I think. (Phil B. or JR help me out here). Anyway, I'm going to need some money next July when Rhoda and I are celebrating her 70th birthday and our 25th Anniversary. We are going to the Netherlands and cruising around to different cities and countries. Our anniversary will be my second 25th and I believe 2 x 25 = 50. So send gold.

You can see in our picture that Rho is holding a glass of wine and we are on a cruise ship. You can also see that I am smiling, an extremely rare event. I am not a very good smiler; not that I like not to smile...it's just that I never seem to hear or see or touch or smell anything worth smiling about. For example, when we go out to dine with another couple or two, and I forget my hearing aids, I miss all the jokes and the banter; so I just nod my head, like I really heard what was said. Or I just put on a smile, and if what I didn't hear was not a joke, people look at me and wonder why I'm smiling. It could be insulting. You can't win. So, take a good long look at my smile in the picture and try to remember what it looks like next time we socialize.

Oh, I forgot to write about my embarrassing moment today. I went to 3rd Federal Bank to buy the CD and told the clerk I wanted the 5.41 8 month certificate. He said they only had a 5.25 CD. I said that I printed out the application from the internet. He asked to see it, and then he said I was in the wrong bank. The CD was offered by World Bank. There you are. I had dollars but no sense.

Games, Gods, and Gambling

"The thing which hath been, it is that which shall be, and that which is done is that which
shall be done; and there is no new thing under the sun." ECCLESIASTES i.9

Today, Rhoda's organization, The City of Hope, had an outing to Florida's newest gaming and gambling mecca in Pompano Beach. It is a magnificent casino...Las Vegas style, called "The Isle Casino and Racing" The racing part refers to the Pompano Racing Track nearby. This casino, strangely enough, is not run by the Seminoles, like the Hard Rock Casino in Ft. Lauderdale, but apparently is sponsored by the state. I'm not really sure because I seem to remember a gambling casino was voted down several years ago by the electorate. Anyway, one no longer has to shlep to Las Vegas, Atlantic City, Biloxi, or Connecticut to play poker, craps, or slot machines. We have all of that virtually in our back yard. So, Rhoda and I delegated a $100 each for our slot machine addiction fix. She lost about $60 and I $40. However, our friend Helen Herbstman, won $1000 on a 2 cent machine! Now, you have to understand that this lady, though definitely not Irish, must have kissed the Blarney Stone or picked a 4-leaf clover somewhere because she wins anything/everything/all the time.
She has won a motorcycle, a trip for two to Hawaii, two tickets to last year's Super Bowl, a year's supply of gasoline for her car, and a humongous dinosaurus Rex TV Set, and the Lord knows what else. She may have won her husband, Mike, in a City of Hope raffle. So, slot machines, like any gambling, giveth and taketh away and there's nothing new under the sun.

And speaking of the Lord, my neighbor Billy Berger--a very bright man with an inquiring mind, and a thirst for knowledge--Oh, forgive me; I don't mean that Billy is really "the Lord". I am just writing a very convoluted sentence here. Anyway he recently suggested that periodically we two should have a discussion on some important subject. Consequently, I challenged him to come up with some version of his thoughts about God. Now, I am pleased to say that he has written a virtual dissertation on a Word document about his vision of God and religion. Of course, it's too long to publish here, but for the most part Bill appears to be in limbo on those subjects. He also "giveth" and "taketh" away...but promises more to come.
And, of course, he is no different from many of the rest of us...confused about the existence and nature of "God". So, again...there's nothing new under the sun.

And getting back to Ecclesiastes, the "...thing that hath been, and the thing that shall be" is that which shall be done and that is we are not dining at home....but OUT...again. Nothing new here either. Have a nice day.

The Red Baron

Hi friends and family: Some of you may have been wondering why I'm using the name "Red Baron". It seems that some of my teaching colleagues after learning of my 60 combat missions in WWII and of my shooting down 2 1/2 Stukas and 1 1/2 Messerschmitts and of surviving a crash on the runway and in the English Channel, named me the "American" Red Baron. But they were far off the mark.

Manfred von Richthofen was born on May 2, 1892 in Breslau, Germany (now Wroclaw Poland). He died on April 21, 1918, age 25, in the skies over Vaux sur Somme, France. His people called him der rote Kampfflieger (The Red Battle-Flyer), The French called him le petit rouge, and he is known in the English speaking world as the Red Baron. In a time of wooden and fabric aircraft, when twenty air victories insured a pilot legendary status and the coveted Pour Le Mérite (the famous "Blue Max") , Richthofen had eighty victories, and is regarded to this day as the ace of aces. He used red paint on his aircraft so that friendly fire on the ground would recognize him. He certainly went way beyond my own insignificant aerial warfare, and his 80 "kills" are incredible. So now you know...and I'm proud to carry on this ace's legacy even though he was my Dad's enemy.

Today is kind of a "blah" day. Rho went out to lunch with Mary Gurien my friend since 1957. Mary's husban, Eric, who used to be on my golf foursome died several years ago of cancer. He was a really sweet man and he is being missed. I've been in the house all day doing "work" on the computer and trying to decide what could be of interest to people tuning in here. So, I decided to start off with the Red Baron nickname. Tonite we're having the Nathan's hot dogs that we were supposed to have last nite, but Rho's card game was called off and she opted to go to Cheeburger Cheeburger for .... you guessed it, a hamburger. Today I've also been trying to figure out how best to manage this blog. It's very complicated. I managed to publish the Sib's picture, but it's supposed to go on yesterday's blog, and I can't find how to move it to the right place. Can you?

Finally, we've decided to have the Bergers, the Strumlaufs, and the Herbstmans over for Rosh Hashanah and a turkey dinner with several other blandishments. I can't wait for the Manischevitz wine. L'Shanah Tova.

Finding Nemo? He's on PK's Arm.

All the sibs are now home from their cruise to Alaska, and apparently they all had
a very good time, although I haven't gotten many details. Joel created a web page where they could all post their picture albums and Robin downloaded about 97 pictures among which is the one on this post. To the left is Robin, Bobby, Bonny, and Joel.

On the right: From left to right front row: Barbara (Joel's wife), Bonny, PK (Princess Katrina, Bobby's daughter, Robin, and Riza, Robin's childhood friend who also has a house in Big Timber. Back row: Don, Bonny's husband; Joel, Bobby, and Warren, Riza's husband.

On one of the pictures in Robin's album, Katrina's right arm is decorated
with tattoos. You would think that she would have had a heart with "I Love Grandpa" running through it; but no. It's a bunch of fish from the film "Finding Nemo" or "Losing Nemo" I don't recall which. At any rate, I do hope PK doesn't wander off to some fishing pier where a wayward flycast might catch her right arm and rip Nemo right out of it and into the frying pan. I suppose she now is back to work at Harley-Davidson in California. For the uninitiated, Katrina graduated from Motorcycle Mechanics Institute in Phoenix. Her Dad is a Harley Sales Associate in Virginia, and a very good one. Can't blame Katrina for having tattoos because she is emulating her grandfather who got his first tattoo in Key West in 1942. It's an anchor with the letters USN running through it. So at least my granddaughter opted for a Pisces theme, honoring my February birth! Thanks, sweetie!

Today it was RH's turn for doctors. This morning to her dermatologist; this p.m. to her internist. In between these appointments, she is at a City of Hope card party. I believe I have mentioned that Rho went to California last month to a City of Hope convention and she is going to be installed as President of the Huntington Lakes Chapter at the end of September. She is Florida's version of Hillary Clinton, although I doubt that Hillary plays Canasta. My day has consisted in going to IHOP for a senior's breakfast, to Publix for some potato salad (hot dogs for dinner), and to the post office for stamps. Truly a most memorable morning. Now, as you can tell, I am creating this blog. The principal honoree is Katrina Ross Schilling, a young lady with a wonderful gene pool.

Nova, Eggs, and Onions

HI. We had a really pleasant evening last nite with the Bergers, Bev & Bill (she made it known that she prefers her name first). Went to Sal's Italian restaurant. I had spaghetti and meat sauce, and what the others had is not really important right now. The good news is that the food was fine, the bad news is that I got stains on my very new designer shirt that Rho bought for me "just like this" (no occasion). Now I have no idea how the stains got there because I tied the napkin around my neck. Food stains uncannily find their way onto my shirt, no matter what I do. If I ate without a shirt the stains would somehow show up on the shirt in my closet. Last nite was also pickontheredbaron nite. Three against one. They wanted me to go walk in the pool to see if that would help my "claudication" leg problems. I reiterated for the 10th iterated time that it was too much of a hassle to go to the pool every day. First and last of all the bathing suit I wore here 25 years ago would only fit on one leg now. So, let's not go down that road anymore.

Now, Rho, whom I love dearly said she would make me nova, eggs, and onions this Sunday morning. So, when I finally got out of bed at 11:30 for breakfast, it was seen that the new stove had nothing on it, and she was busying herself with doing laundry and sundry other chores. When I suggested that I was ready for the nova, eggs, and onions, she suggested back that she was not running a restaurant, and that she already had finished making nova, eggs, and onions for herself a couple of hours earlier. Now, I need some comments on this matter. A promise should be fulfilled and the restaurant should have reopened. Anyway, I made my own breakfast with coffee and cream cheese on an English muffin. (To comment, just click on the word "comments" and then follow the directions).

I read in the paper this morning that several high school and prep school baseball players who were high in the draft were given signing bonuses of $2,000,000! Right out of high school! I figured out that for me to have made two million dollars in my working days, I would have to have averaged some $40,000 a year for 50 years. Now, what's the lesson and moral of this story for the next generation of parents? As soon as your baby is in the crib, drop in a basketball, a baseball, a bat, a soccer ball, a tennis racket, and ice skates. Put away the Bar/Batmitzvah and college money, and then watch what happens. Have a nice day.